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Truth Be Told

February 25, 2016

“Tell me how you really feel.” My daughter said matter-of-factly while we were shopping last week in response to my statement that the purse she was admiring wasn’t big enough for all her ‘mommy stuff’ as she calls it. Laughing out loud I replied, “Gee, I get that a lot!” Can’t imagine why.

Actually, truth be told is exactly what you’ll get if you ask me anything…and occasionally even if you don’t ask, I’ll admit candidly. So, if you really don’t want an honest, straight from the hip answer, it’s best not to ask…me anyway. Interesting shift in reasoning, because I never used to be this way. I was actually rather good at being subtle. Shoot fire, I could skirt an issue and never directly answer a question like a politician running for office. You know how some people sugar-coat a compliment so much you’d gain two pounds hearing it. Well, I’ve never been into slinging artificial sweetener around but I could beat around the bush so many times I’d surreptitiously change the subject to not step on toes.

Not anymore, like they say out with the old and in with the new. Today blunt and honest are practically my middle names. That is…if I had middle names. It’s almost as if holding back for me is like trying to restrain a race horse after the gate it opened; nearly impossible. Dickens, I just open my mouth and whatever I’m thinking comes flying out like a lightening bug let loose from a jar. Whoomp! There it is!

Like the time I told my date during dinner that yellow looked awful on him. (I sugar coated ‘awful’ if you must know.) “Gee, tell me how you really feel.” He responded laughing nervously.

“That yellow shirt looks like #$*/@! on you!” I said laughing, obviously joking around at that point. But honestly, he looked like a washed out dead fish in pale yellow. In some vain way he took it well and we laughed about it as we finished our meal. Then he went home and changed before we went dancing. Thank goodness or I would have had to concoct a hair washing emergency or suffer the sudden onset of a migraine or… Oops, am I typing out loud?

Anywho, not sure when or how it happened that I became so direct. I’ve always been honest like I said; I just used to disguise it better. Maybe it’s been since the brain injury. Reports have proven people’s personalities often change after brain trauma. Or maybe it’s because I’ve gotten more in touch with my authentic self on this path of self-awareness and spiritual growth I’ve embarked on over the past ten years. Whatever the reason, I’ve realized most folks appreciate my frankness. However unrefreshing as it might sound at first my friends, and yes, strangers, realize my intention is simply truthfulness.

Makes me wonder why we aren’t more deliberately honest; in our relationships; amongst family members; in our work environment; toward our spouse; with our children; amongst our peers; with ourselves? Truth be told, we could probably all use a heaping dose of integrity. Especially with ourselves because in reality we’re probably the one person we lie to the most.

We eat poorly and tell ourselves it’s not affecting our health, besides we’ll eat better later. We smoke, chew, rub, and dip and tell ourselves it hasn’t harmed us yet, besides we’ll quit later. We drink to excess and tell ourselves we can stop anytime, sooner or later. We’ve fallen out of love or never fell to begin with yet tell ourselves if we just hang on long enough the relationship will get better, later. We stay in emotionally, or heaven forbid physically abusive relationships and tell ourselves they’ll change, later. Our families are in shambles yet we tell ourselves it’ll improve, later. We dread going to work, we dread going home, we dread waking up to our own lives yet we tell ourselves it’s got to get better, later. We tell ourselves to take that long look in the mirror at ourselves, our lives, our behavior, our attitude, our relationships…on second thought, maybe later.

Friends, it’s time to be brutally honest. Stop pulling the wool over your own eyes because truth be told by the time later gets here for most of us it will be too late.

Can you imagine…honesty being the best policy again?

Smile, it looks so good on you!



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