November 10, 2016
Whew, the election is finally over! Some of us are upset by the final tally; others of us are elated at the outcome. Dickens, it sure was a long and awkwardly unpleasant campaign at times. My brother threatened to move out of the country if one of the candidates won and I threatened to move if the other one did. No worries though, no one is moving. However, next time everyone is feeling uncomfortable with our political choices let’s all agree to vote for ourselves. Now, that’s a happy thought!
More happy thoughts include simply doing what makes you feel happiest…within reason and legal, of course. Except running down the street stark naked singing Jingle Bells while donning a Santa hat; besides that was so last year and the neighbors nearly converted after witnessing your little, and I do mean little, jolly adventure. This year keep your jingle bells in your tights and opt for a cheery Christmas comedy instead. There are heaps of holiday hilarity to choose from.
Obviously, experts agree laughing is an awesome way to shake off the blahs. Therefore, if election results left you singing the blues learn a new joke, tell an old one, or hang out with some entertaining friends and let the laughter flow. Which reminds me, my handsome beau and I went to the Renaissance Festival last weekend and heard this witty joke told by, who else, a nun: “A pirate walked into a bar with a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. Perplexed, the bartended inquired, “Isn’t that bothering you?” “Arrrrgh…it’s driving me nuts!”” (Feel free to click like and share.)
Although many of us might feel the need to abandon ship in the political aftermath allow me to suggest ‘happy thoughts’ alternatives like doing something you’ve always wanted to do. Underwater basket weaving anyone? Kidding, actually I know you’ve always harbored a secret desire to run with the bulls in Spain. Oh, come on, the new president isn’t that…on second thought run fast, turn left.
Then after you arrive back valiantly un-punctured, other happy thoughts include making sure you’re taking better care of yourself offsetting the need to worry about healthcare. Simple adjustments like eating less fried food and more fruits and veggies would go a long way toward keeping your out-of-pocket deductible in your pocket. Of course, depending on election results you may require a fruit smoothie with a droplet of tonic, as Granny (The Beverly Hillbillies) called it. What’s that? How many drops are in a droplet? Would you like the politically correct answer, or Granny’s (generous) recipe? Never mind, use prudence and think happy thoughts as you sip.
Plus, now might be a good time to take that cruise as a fun filled distraction from mainland mayhem. Yeppers, you’re never too young to start checking adventures off the ol’ bucket list. Ladies, mark your calendars, your fantasy of staying at a dude ranch surrounded by tall, handsome, tanned, muscular hunks of maleness in cowboy boots is about to come true. Oh wait...that’s me. In that case ladies, I’m positive you have something on your ‘things that make me happy’ list to embrace while relaxing and basking in happy thoughts as Carlos rubs coconut oil on…oops, me again! My bad.
As for you fellas…hmm…gee, all you have to do is walk in Hooters and believe you’re in another world as happy thoughts filling tiny tees ask, “What can I get you?” Seriously though gentlemen…gentlemen…HEY GUYS! As I was saying, if you find yourself slightly, to full scale, nuclear after the election dust settles, suck it up buttercups and remember it’s only for the next 1461 days. (Added a day for Leap year.)
Writer’s note: As of this writing I have no idea which newly elected President we woke up to Wednesday morning. However, I imagine a mixture of shock, or satisfaction reverberated amongst my readers depending on in who you cast your vote. I won’t judge either way and ask you to offer the same in kind. Please. Remember friends, for all our sakes, we are ALL in this together. So let’s stand tall, stay united and inspire happy thoughts in ourselves and each other.
What? Yes, Hooters is open seven days a week. I can’t believe you are still there…that was an entire paragraph ago…!
Can you imagine…where a pirate found a steering wheel?
Smiling is a happy thought!