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Sport Dating

April 13, 2017

Remember when I joined a dating site a few months ago? (For research purposes.) So far, I haven’t physically met anyone. I realize I’m a little slow out of the gate and old fashioned, however, I have spoken with several very nice gentlemen. Meeting in person is an entirely different matter though. For me anyway…yikes!

I suppose I’m hesitant because, just like everything else, online dating has its share of bad apples. More often than I’d care to admit I was approached by not-so-nice gentlemen. Whom I blocked…right after I slapped my computer.

How inappropriate when a man’s ego gets the best of him and he feels it necessary to be rude after a simple, “No thank you.” All-in-all though, I’d say most are the nice-guy variety.

Great news for single ladies! Or so I thought until…after reading just a few profiles I discovered the term: Sport Dating. Momentarily stumped, I had an idea, but wasn’t sure what it meant from a male perspective. So, I Googled. To paraphrase the Urban Dictionary, Sport Dating is considered: a constant string of first dates with no intention of starting a relationship, or ever having a second date. In other words, dating as a sporting event (for women) means free food and drinks with as many unsuspecting men as possible. Dickens, whatever happened to going ‘Dutch’? I’m always willing pay, which, as the gentleman usually covers the tab anyway, is met with my sincere gratitude for a pleasant first date.

Logistically speaking, however, not every dating experience sets off New Year’s Eve style fireworks. Even I’ve had my share of ‘spark-free’ encounters. It’s no one’s fault really. An equal attraction on both sides of the dinner-date table, while hoped for, isn’t realistic. Be it the other’s physical appearance, personality, or something green stuck in their teeth. If you’re serious about meeting someone special, however, getting together to discover ‘if there’s an attraction’ needs to happen. If not, you’ll never know if a second date is in the cards.

Fair warning men, if she bails (usually meaning she changed her name, number and moved to Omaha, never to be heard from again), don’t take it personally. Although, you may want to check your teeth before your next adventure. Otherwise, chalk it up to ‘she simply wasn’t into’ your dashingly handsome, amazing self. Just don’t be so quick to dump her into the dungeon of spoiled-sport daters. Besides, there is a 50/50 chance she’s not out for a free meal. Then again, it’s 50/50 she could be. Either way, fifty percent is good. Right?

On the bright side, discovering a list of ‘things in common’ may initially lead a couple down second date road. Maybe even round three avenue. Not always a guarantee of continued courting; but if you’ve made it beyond the first date you’re on the plus side of 50/50. My point is…sometimes it takes a few rendezvous to determine if two people ignite raging sparks or fizzle out. As some of us are aware, spark-free normally leads to the dreaded ‘let’s just be friends’ discussion. Only a downer to the infatuated other-side-of-the-table. Trust me, I’ve had to initiate this conversation. Some handle the ‘friendship’ offer well, others don’t.

At any rate, fizz or sparks, I’m a little concerned about the negative impact dating is having on the male population. It’s obvious the temperament of the masculine persuasion has heated up. A very enlightening, and disheartening, experience to note this attitude shift. Honestly, I’ve read several profiles that were so mean spirited I can’t even imagine there’d be any room for someone to sit at the table with all the baggage these men are carrying around.

Personally ladies, I’m not a supporter of Sport Dating. However, from a female perspective, I’m also opposed to a man deciding you are now ‘dating’ on the first date. Unless blazing sparks are bouncing off the floor, ceiling, windows, each other’s teeth, it’s a huge NO-NO according to dating etiquette to assume this position.

Gentlemen, if a lady dates several men to decide whether a second date sounds fun, it’s not sport dating. It’s...checking out the merchandise. Sort of like going to the grocery store and choosing apples. The first one you pick up might appear appealing. But on closer examination there is a huge bruise, or worse, major damage. Even the slightest nibble would render a bad taste.

Therefore ladies, men are like apples. Dating is like grocery shopping. Choose your fruit wisely.

Men, you’re the apple. Be as appealing on the inside as your shiny red surface is on the outside. POOF! A second date could be in your near future.

Wishing both sides of the table…HAPPY SPARKS!

Can you imagine…a ‘dating made easy’ handbook?

Smile, there’s nothing in your teeth!



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