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Summer Break

May 30, 2013

Did you have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend? Mine was terrific and started at Lowe’s, buying 35 landscape timbers (hey, they were on sale). Then things really got out-of-control exciting when I found a DeWALT cordless drill on sale. (My Craftsman bit the dust.) Oh boy! I was practically drooling when I picked it up and pulled the purrrred. Hey, daddy raised me right, I’m a girl with power tools and I’m not afraid to use them. Shoot fire, owning a DeWALT drill feels as awesome as when I got my American Express card—I don’t think I’ll leave home without it.

Wowzer! Suddenly, all I wanted to do was, er...or, unscrew...something. Anything! First, I removed all the hardware from an old wood and glass door I’m refinishing. Riding the wave of satisfaction, and fresh out of things to unscrew, I decided to clean the garage next. That’s when I picked up a ceramic flower pot and saw something black and rubbery. Momentarily perplexed, I couldn’t figure out what I had stuffed in the pot that looked like an old hose with a herringbone design. As my mind searched its memory banks, simultaneously it screamed SNAKE! Half tossing, half setting the pot back down I took more than one fast steps back.

The snake was in a flower pot under the light switch, the same one I turned on when I walked in, and beside the door, again, I had walked through. Not surprisingly, my mind zipped through a zillion questions at once. How big was it? How hungry was it? I wonder if those wicker chairs I need to paint would look fabulous in light cream? Just then I noticed a snake head peak over the top of the pot. Shoot, shoot, shoot, I woke it up! My renters weren’t home and I was alone with a huge snake blocking my exit to, did I need a man in the worse way! Yep, it was definitely time to play my girl card. Grabbing my cell I started calling male friends in order of how close in proximity they are to my house. However, being a holiday weekend no one answered till Mark. Hurriedly, I explained my dilemma and I just needed validation on what I already snakes are cool, right? He laughed at my predicament and said he would rush over and rescue me but he was in Colorado visiting a friend. Of course! Actually, I just felt relieved telling someone my last known whereabouts. You know...just in case.

Whew! It’s not usually that exciting around here. Just before I felt industrious about working in the garage I had been peacefully lying in the sun soaking up some rays. Getting ready for a trip to the beach next month and I want to blend in. Plus, Margery said to bring a fishing pole. Wowzer! I hadn’t been fishing in a ‘coon’s age. Come to think of it, I haven’t been to the beach in a month of Sundays either. Holy dickens, two birds with one stone, this is sure shaping up to be a fantastic summer.

Speaking of summer, you may recall I’ve taken the last two summers off. The first summer was to have some holistic energy work done and study the art of healing. Last summer practically everything I owned that runs on a battery had a meltdown. Plus, my ex had a massive heart attack. He’s fine; in fact we filed for divorce, which should be final before the fourth of July. After five years of separation, it was time.

This summer I’m off and running again working diligently on marketing my TRUTH/DARE seminars and workshops. A new website and video are being created while I’ve been preparing a workshop for Goodwill Industries’ staff members. I’ll also be publishing my sixth eBook, “Washington’s Travels,” on Hmmm...what else? Oh yeah, I’m taking horseback riding lessons from a friend of mine’s wife. Plus, I’ll be spending time with Dad when I go to my high school reunion in August, while visiting a friend in PA on the way back. Helen and I decided someway, somehow we’d be on a pontoon this summer. Wowzer, that reminds me, I’ll be singing “Pontoon” on stage with my favorite band and you might catch me singing with my favorite karaoke partner, Rick, somewhere this summer. Wowzer! It’s promising to be a fantastic summer! Time to get the fishing poles...oh wait, there’s a snake in my garage...dang!

 Yes, this is my last column till fall, friends, and I just want you to know I already miss all of you. Take care of yourselves and have a wonderfully, scrumptious and fantastic summer!! Love, hugs and miles of smiles!

Can you imagine...if I name the snake Dee Pendant G and claim him on my taxes?

Smiles all summer long! | |



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Mom’s Rocking Chair

Plan B

Whoosh Happens

Perfect Day

The Classics

Little Dreamers

Self-help vs. Help Ourselves

Biological Clock

Dust Bunnies Beware

The Greatest Tea Party

Tropical Breezes

The Synonym of Melanie

The Greatest Love Story

Hug Hair




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