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October 17, 2013

Wowzer, you should see the huge dent in my rear end! It looks like a meteor crashed into me and left a gaping hole. All I could say when it happened was “WHAT THE DICKENS?!” (a.k.a. WTD)

Yeppers, there I was waiting to turn left and daydreaming about the rippling abs of “The Rock” when I was startled back to reality by the sound of screeching tires. Quickly glancing in my rearview mirror all I saw was the windshield of a vehicle behind me. It was THAT CLOSE! Certain they were about to slam into me and shatter an otherwise idyllic morning, I responded with a quick WTD and a death grip on the steering wheel. Yet, just as suddenly they jerked sharp to the right and hit the back right corner of my car. Whew! I’m sorry it happened but grateful they didn’t hit me flush. I would have gotten hurt worse and they could have been seriously hurt.

Suffering momentary confusion after the impact, however, I finally realized I needed to pull over, because…well, we’re supposed to pull vehicles to the side of the road, when possible, and call the police. Then exchange insurance information and take pictures of the driver and vehicle damage. Maybe snap a few shots of some of the local foliage, and a couple of unusual cloud formations… you know the drill

But that wasn’t what the universe had planned that morning. Instead, it resulted in me being the victim of a ‘hit and run’. Who does that…someone without a license, or insurance, or maybe someone who cuts the tags off mattresses and pillows? Guess I naively thought people don’t really do that to others. Well, I woke up from that daydream too as I sat stunned watching the small silver (Toyota, or Ford Ranger) extended cab truck with the black graphic swoosh on the side doors drive off. Suddenly, I was overcome by a crazy notion to high tail it after them! Except there was a lot of passing traffic and I couldn’t get back on the road.

Fortunately, the last car was a Deputy Sheriff who witnessed the entire ‘hit and run’ and stopped beside me long enough to make sure I was okay, then he took off after the truck. Well, my stubborn streak kicked into high gear and I got back on the road and figured I’d help nab the perpetrator. Oh boy! The chase was on. (I’m now thinking, “What the dickens was I thinking?”) That’s when I dialed 911 and explained that I was chasing the ‘hit and run’ driver and where were the police, the FBI and that ‘mayhem’ guy from the TV commercials?

Needless to say, ‘hit and run’ describes it all. The driver got away, so I gave the police my account of the morning’s events. Later that day, I went to the hospital because I had shooting pains in my arm, and my thumb and first two fingers felt like they had been hit by a hammer. Not to mention, my shoulder felt like it had been the ball at the end of a batter’s swing. Ouch! But the doctor gave me meds and a sling to ease my strained muscles.

When I got home, my renter noticed my arm in the sling so I recounted the events and showed him the crater then asked, “Do you think they’ll total it?” He laughed; then said ‘no’. “Really? Shucks!” Tomorrow I’m taking it to the repair shop to assess the damage. While they’ve got it, I wonder if they can pimp my ride and turn it into a Jaguar; or at least a quad cab pickup truck because the canine crew loves to ride.

Can you imagine…seeing nothing but someone’s windshield in your rearview mirror?

Smile, if you don’t have dents in your rear. | |



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