$1.5 Billion You’ll Never See,
or A Really Powerful Ball
January 21, 2016
Let’s be honest, the lottery is the biggest inside joke, daydream and conversation piece in America. Who hasn’t pondered what they’d do if they won a great sum of cash? Who hasn’t jokingly said, “Well when I win the lottery…” and you fill in the blank with revenge schemes, outrageous purchases or the fantasy of living the “easy life.”
The House o’Saw (this would be mine own primary residence) is no exception to these types of conversations. What would we do if we won the lotto? The ironic part is we’ve never played or considered playing…until a few weeks ago. When the unclaimed grand prize lottery payout hit the $1.3 billion mark, many who never thought they’d purchase a ticket found themselves hard pressed not to.
Thus a trip to the nearest Powerball friendly convenience store was in order for lil’Red (that’s Mrs. Chainsaw) and me. We took Tot (a.k.a. the grandson/small roomie) along. He was very excited, especially when the response to his query of “Where are we going?” was an exuberant “To play the Powerball!” When we arrived he was very confused and informed us “There’s no power ball in there!” I assured him there was and excitement re-ensued. Inside, his little eyes scanned everything searching for the power ball. We told him we had to fill out special tickets to play…he took several. Settling on one we let him select some numbers- oh boy almost power ball time! Then…we waited in line…very patiently…well as patiently as a four-year-old can. “Look Pappy! Gloves!” pitter-patter back down the aisle with “Grammie” (lil’Red) in protective hot pursuit.
Tickets purchased, we left the store with a very disappointed and confused toddler. “I thought we were gonna play power ball?” he stated/asked. We told him we just did and his confusion mounted as he exclaimed “We forgot the power ball!” at which point I told him it was right here and showed him the ticket. Needless to say he was quite disappointed.
This small incident with this very small person brings to light the perspective of the little people in our lives. A child could care less about winning the lotto. They sure as hell don’t give a hoot about a piece of paper that represents a chance to win the lotto. But a ball, especially a POWER BALL now that’s something. Did he expect us to go into a room that randomly fired dodgeballs? Was the concept of “playing” power ball running through a barrage of bouncing balls, the final goal leaving with one? Or was it like an egg hunt and if you found the power ball you got to immediately claim your prize which was…the power ball…and maybe candy? Surely it wasn’t a bunch of tired, hopeless looking people standing in line to fill out a piece of paper, then standing in line again to get another piece of paper; this done with hopeless odds of winning $1.5 billion dollars.
Initially it would seem that the innocent unknowing child’s view of the situation is just that—innocent and unknowing. Not understanding that if your numbers came up you’d have enough money to buy as many bouncy balls in any size and color you wanted. You’d even have enough to pay people to bounce them at you if you won. And it’s that key word “if” that turns the tide in the toddler’s favor.
As adults we see logic in going to a store, to stand in line, to fill out a ticket, to stand in line, to get a ticket, to get a chance in 2 hundred million that we might win some money. From a toddler’s point of view they walk into a store and one way or another they come out a winner and they have a ball—literally and fundamentally. So who is unknowing? You can’t bounce a piece of paper…unless it’s a check.
The moral to this story: money can’t buy happiness if you don’t win it so have a ball!
For those of you concerned for the little fellow’s feelings, no worries. A large red yoga ball will soon be purchased and the words POWER-BALL imprinted upon just for him. National Problem Gambling Helpline 1-800-522-4700.
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Hope to hear from ya, until then try and stay focused. See ya!