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Used Children

November 14, 2013

There have been a few of you who have expressed your concern that the chainsaw has lost its edge. This impression impressed upon you because of the occasional “soft” piece of material shared here. Let me remind you that a chainsaw is not always cutting and spends an equal amount time in a dormant state. Likewise this column will occasionally drift into a pacified lull. So sweet side stories of forlorn romantic intent, sweet nothings and stuffed bears may, on occasion, appear. If this troubles you then you have my sincerest apologies for the fact that nobody cares what you think. However take heart and take note, regardless of how light some of these columns appear they always have a point and that point is oft very sharp indeed. That being said we proceed onward and open with a touching thought accompanied by the pitter patter of toddler sized Superman shoes.

“When we see our children, in all their beautiful innocence, we like to think we would kill for them, die for them. When we become grandparents we no longer think- we know.”

We’ll take a moment here to acknowledge the fact that my grandson a.k.a. Tot, just celebrated his second birthday this past weekend. Now I could fawn relentlessly about how smart he is, his good humor, his progressive developmental skills and good hygiene. But the fact of the matter is it would just be the same old same old any grandparent would say. Not dismissing the pride we should take in our offspring, but seriously who wants to read redundancy? Let’s keep it real and sum it up by simply saying he’s a grand lil fellow, a spectacular little person and wins the hearts of any who cross his path...except ******** who suck.

Now aside from the ending chuckle, there was something else you should have taken notice of in that last paragraph. The Tot’s birthday was acknowledged. There was no wishing of a Happy Birthday, nor was there any other statement of that nature aimed at said tot. Do you know why? Well it’s pretty simple, you see tots can’t read. So why express a written, printed or typed birthday wish to a tot? And now we sharpen that point we mentioned earlier and everybody gets upset...because it stuck them in the eye.

One must wonder the true intent behind a person wishing their own, below reading-aged child, a printed message. Especially ones that come from the readily available, easily accessible social media circles that the child would neither see nor be able to comprehend. Friends and relatives chiming in to wish a toddler well online is one thing. But a Happy Birthday wish directed toward your own child in this manner becomes questionable. Seriously, what is the point? If you want to let the world know of your toddler’s events or accomplishments mention them proudly, don’t address the child. Unless of course you’re seeking attention for yourself.

Ooo did that get you in the eye...sorry.

Hopefully it didn’t and you do not fall into that sad category of those who use their children to seek their own glory.

These are the pathetic souls whom, when public attention is available, brandish their offspring like a medal of their honor. Most often through tykes who have yet to reach a point of verbal self-expression. Parading the child around in an obvious bid to absolve their own self-absorption, using the child to get attention, pity or to make themselves feel important because lookie at me I’m a “good parent.”

If you’re a good parent it shows, people will see, there’s no need to point it out. Most often it shines brightest when it’s just you and the child. If you require the assistance and support of a crowd to know you’re a good parent then you’re probably not. Because guess what? It doesn’t make a rat’s arse what other people say and what you think of your own parenting skills doesn’t matter. There is only one person who can judge your parenting skills and that is your child. And eventually, in time, they will let you know.

Questions, comments and column ideas are welcome via Focus, or just E-mail me at Or you can FRIEND me on Facebook under Saw’s Brood!

Hope to hear from ya, until then try and stay focused. See ya!




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