“Yo, come on move this! People don’t you know, don’t you know it’s about time! Can’t you hear the jam is pumpin’ while you taste the piece of mine? Baby, let me show you how to do this- you’ve gotta move this, come on and move this! Move this, move this, move this you’ve gotta move this, come on and move this! Move it, move it…” ENOUGH… STOP THE CHILLED OUT GROOVE! (Points awarded if you get that random reference) or hastily halt the happy hit hip-hop! We don’t really wanna be still talking about this so we sure as hell aren’t going to sing our way into it! Oh FYI – Lyrics unintentionally excerpted from Technotronic’s 1992 Eurodance, hip house hit “Move This”, featuring Ya Kid K.

Advance apologies to regular readers, who tire of this topic; your pain is felt and shared, because this writer is sick of writing about, as well as living it. This can be seen when you decipher this week’s column title, “Motion Sickness” because I am sick of moving! However, this is what is currently going on and seems to be forever going on, so we all must suffer together. As the old saying goes- “Misery loves company,” and I’m so glad you’ve dropped by.

We have now been in the process of moving out and in for a small eternity… roughly 2 months, a handful of days and fistful of hours. Sincerest sympathies extended to anyone who’s had to move on the fly, been evicted or had to skip town overnight. I don’t know how you did it, because frankly, this is taking forever. Yes, we are blessed to have such a wide time frame to work with, but still…my gawd… does it know no end???

The stuff, heavens help us and may the saints preserve us for the stuff. Despite what the jingle says “you can get enough…of the stuff!” (Bonus points awarded if you get that old-school B-movie reference.) The plethora of possessions is mind-boggling… and you can’t get rid of enough of it! 4-3/8 truckloads (one actually loaded back up from stuff already moved) have already been hauled away, or sold, and still it’s everywhere.

At night silent prayers are sent for a small controlled fire, maybe the result of a rogue baby dragon. A fire that would incinerate the houses’ contents leaving the walls, floors, ceilings… oh, and people too, untouched, for the sake of mass de-stuffing. And yet we’re still stepping around it, shifting it from one side of the room to the other, packing it up then unpacking it down. All the while try to make one residence livable and occupied whilst trying to make another vacant and sold.

As it turns out the “sold” part is surprisingly easier than one can fathom. Yes, all the rumors you’ve heard about the booming housing market are true. The House o’ Saw wasn’t even officially listed before the first showing along with an opening bid. Then it was pulled off the open market after 8 showings and multiple legit bids acquired in less than 4 days.

Now, already under contract, our moving window has begun to slide closed. Pressure’s on, getting higher and we still need a washer & dryer (+more points).

Trying to live in and move out of a home whilst trying to keep it immaculately clean and tidy for potential buyers, appraisers and real-estate agents is a challenge. Simultaneously moving into, repairing and keeping another house reasonably immaculate (we’re not that picky) seems impossible. There is never a pause and little rest. You’re either cleaning and packing at one or cleaning and unpacking at another. Exhaustion and frustration reign supreme trapped in this endlessly insane fluff cycle in a drying machine we don’t even have yet.

Now if this seems like whining, b****ing or complaining, well it’s not… well maybe a little but it’s not meant to be… because there’d be no point in that. Life happens and we move on and sometimes we’re moving while it’s happening. There’s nothing we can do about it but pack-up, clean-up, move out and move on. There’s sure to be more life happening at our next stop in it.

Next week: Please gawd let it be about something other than moving… so very tired of this.

I welcome almost all questions, comments via FOCUS, or E-mail me at [email protected].

Hope to hear from ya, until then try and stay focused! See ya.